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Friday, November 22, 2013

Help me Pls ! My Lover Appears To Hate My Family but says she Loves Me



I was directed to this platform when I searched on "Best way to handle a stubborn wife" on the net, I decided to write a new post because I do really need all the sincere advise I can get from you all not just a passing comment please. I am 38 years old and my wife is 30 years old, I met and married my wife after just six months of courtship, the marriage is four years old and is blessed with two beautiful  kids, I'm a civil servant and she is self employed, we stays in one bed room apartment. Continue

My wife is the stubborn type, she is not a good cook, her house keeping is poor but she still have other good qualities that I console myself with after all she is just human, but what I found very difficult to condone is her abusing my mother and sisters with all the unprintable words one can think of, what is the sin of my mother and sisters you may ask, the old woman is sick and alone in the village, I, my elder and younger sisters (they are both married) stays in Abuja, my In-law went and brought my mother to Abuja, she stayed with them for about three months and my elder sister who is yet to have a child after ten years of marriage took her, and she stayed with them for about four months, then she came to my place and from the first day she stepped into my place the house turned to the theatre of Nigeria/Biafra war.

I use to love her and I have no doubt in my mind that she loves me, I tried all my possible best to talk some senses into her but all to no avail, I reminded her that her that when she gave birth that her mother visited and stayed with us and I showed her love why treating my mother this way, her response is always that my mother should leave her house and to that I always tell her capital NO.

I swore before I married her that I will never beat my wife, but I have broken that promise once, I brought out my television and broke it out of frustration of what she is doing to my mother, I have called her mother to heap insult on her but I can't see myself doing that but I ended up telling her that her daughter proper home training and to that she(the mother) took serious offense and we have not been talking for the past six months, I have been advised to go and rent house for my mother and to that I also said capital NO.

 My mother will be going next month but even when she is gone how can I live with the memory of what she has gone through in the hands of my wife, with what eyes will I be seeing my wife, the truth of the matter is that I have started seeing her like a stranger and I wonder how I can live with a stranger. I know all the effects divorce will have on the kids but.... I need more mature advice because I can't think straight any more.
Thanks for your advice in anticipation.

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