Wednesday, July 30, 2014

The Issue With Over-Talking





Recently, I was winding down several days of strategic planning sessions for a client. On the last day, the leader of the business, June, took the floor to wrap up the week with a wonderful story and a great metaphor she thought would be inspiring to her team.

She had everyone’s attention… until she didn’t. After four minutes in, she came to what seemed like a natural ending point. However, instead of wrapping up, June kept going, and going, and going.

“Oh no,” I thought, as she proceeded to say the same thing over and over using another colorful story, another great metaphor. I looked around the room and noted that people were reaching for their phones, checking email and Facebook, texting and tweeting. One young woman picked up her pocketbook and stood beside her chair, tapping her super pointy toes, ready to bolt. Her expression clearly said, “Ok, I’ve heard enough.”
Continue..



There’s a fine and delicate balance between the talk/sell/tell and the ask/connect/listen OR,  more simply put, the push/pull of leadership presence. Particularly when presenting to a group, it’s crucial you be crisp, concise and compelling in your delivery—so your audience can stay with you and stay engaged.


Knowing the difference between enough and too much is critical. “Enough” leaves people clear, inspired and hungry for more.
“Too much” leaves your audience confused, restless and bored. My heart hurt for June—I know she was driven to keep going by her deep passion for her team and her desire to get the message just right. Unfortunately, her impact didn’t match her intent. The longer she spoke, the more difficult it was to remember what she’d initially said that resonated. Her message had been watered down so much, the flavor had gotten lost.


We judge ourselves by our intention. Others judge us by our impact. To bridge the gap between the two, it’s important to consider both.

When preparing for your presentation, get clear on your intention:
Ask yourself: what are the 3 main points I want to make?
Stick to them! If people want more, let them ask.
Have an opinion and state it. Don’t be afraid to say what you think, what you recommend, and why. People appreciate leaders who have a point of view—and the courage of their convictions.
Choose sincerity over perfection.

Rather than focusing on getting your speech just right, focus on the impression you want to leave. Ask yourself: What do I want people to walk away thinking? For example, “She’s confident! She knows what she’s talking about! Wow, what a dynamic speaker! She’s very smart and genuine…”
As you’re presenting, keep tabs on your impact by taking the temperature of the room. Notice:

Body language (are people leaning in or leaning back?)
Eye contact (are they looking at you or their phones?)
Facial expressions (interested? inspired? bored? confused?)
Posture (slumped or sitting up straight? tired or energized?)
If it’s clear you’ve lost your audience, take action:

Reel people back in by getting them involved. You might say, “I’ve shared a lot already. Any questions?” Or, “Anyone willing to share what’s resonating most with you?”
If you’re out of time, wrap it up with a quick summary of your main points. For example, “You can tell I’ve got a lot of passion for this topic! Let me wrap up by simply saying X, Y and Z.”
By staying plugged in to the verbal and non-verbal cues in the room, you’ll know if you need to say more—or less. Paying attention to the impact you’re having is the KEY to becoming a better communicator.
Source: galtime.com

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